These Oral Sex Tips Will Blow him away in bed

First step: Stop thinking of it as a job. Done correctly, oral sex can be satisfying for both of you.

Take Control

For established partners, oral sex "can be one of the most empowering things to do because you're taking charge of his pleasure," say Mark Michaels and Patricia Johnson, authors of Bedded Bliss. "That can amp up your own arousal." It's also a time to be exploratory, playful, and fun. With that in mind, do what feels best for you — and by all means request that he return the favor. Once you're ready, start slowly and maintain eye contact as you begin to move your hand up and down his shaft. If you'd like, prep the area by adding a bit offlavored lube that's safe for consumption, like Babeland's Babelicious line, which can make the act a little more palatable and help any initial hand actions go more smoothly.

Let Yourself Linger

Nothing about a blow job should be fast — he wants to savor it, and you'll love making him squirm. So start slow by grazing your mouth against his penis as you continue moving your hand up and down his shaft. One more thing: At this point, it's all right if he's not entirely erect. In fact, it's normal for his erection to ebb and flow during oral sex, and it's not indicative of his pleasure, says Amy Marsh, a Berkeley, CA-based sexologist. Take his temperature now and again by asking him to give you a clue when a move really turns him on. The dirty talk adds to the mood, and it'll make the next time even better. "Being honest about how it feels will boost enjoyment on both sides,"

Take It An Inch At a Time

The deeper, the better may be the case in porn, but not so in real life. "Gagging takes you both out of the moment, and you and he will enjoy oral sex much more when you're both having fun," says Marsh. To simulate deep throating, you want to use some combination of your mouth, tongue and hands. Marsh recommends a tight grip on the base of his shaft. Then wrap your mouth just a bit below the frenulum (the place where the head of the penis connects to the shaft) so your lips meet your fist, and move your mouth and hand in a rhythmic motion. 

Talk It Out

Of course, if you really hate the idea deep throating (and/or have a sensitive gag reflex), it's OK to voice that! "Be mindful of what your body is comfortable doing, and listen to your body as you're giving," suggests De-Andrea Blaylock-Johnson of Sankofa Sex Therapy. If your neck is aching or you feel claustrophobic because he's pushing down on your head, talk out your boundaries before, during, and after the act.

Explore Underneath

The frenulum contains a bundle of nerves, says Marsh. Flick it with the tip of your tongue, or circle the head of the penis slowly, stopping each time you hit thispleasure spot.

Take a Lick

Licking his penis like you're licking an ice cream cone is a guy-pleaser for a reason: Not only does a regular rhythm help get him even more worked up, but it gives you a chance to get into a groove. "Creating a steady rhythm is what builds and sustains excitement,"

Commit to It

Found your groove? Show him you're into it. "Conveying your genuine enthusiasm is thebiggest turn-on," according to Michaels and Johnson. "The more pleasure you feel, and the more you can get across that you're enjoying the act, the more pleasure your partner will receive in turn."

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Spice It Up

Now's the time to keep it nice…or get a bit naughty. Pain tolerance increases with arousal, so you could try digging your fingernails into him, or tightening the grip of your mouth. Letting a bit of your inner Anastasia Steele out at this point can give you both a thrill — especially if you occasionally stop to give  him a devilish look.

Break for Intermission

If your mouth or jaw is feeling achy, simply take a few moments to kiss or caress his thighs, suggest Michaels and Johnson. "Continuing manual stimulation gives your jaw a rest, and it gives you a chance to check in with your partner and see how you're both doing."

Make Some Noise

Want to take the action up a notch? Hum while he's inside your mouth. "The vibrations create an added sensation," say Michaels and Johnson. "Holding a vibrator against your cheek can do the same thing." Finally, don't underestimate the power of a well-timed moan on your end. "Making erotic sounds isn't only a turn on for him. It can also get you more excited," explain Michaels and Johnson.

Finish Off With a Bang

Want to give him an experience he'll never forget? Right before he's about to climax, very lightly tug on his testicles, suggests Marsh. Not only is the skin here super-thin and packed with nerve endings, but just the fact that his most sensitive bits are in your hand will send him over the edge.